Today I wore my yellow and black plaid jacket and a wasp just wouldn't leave me the fuck alone
There I am, trying to enjoy my Ceaser Salad Breakfast, an already difficult feat due to the amount of lettuce used as opposed to any other salad base. And then a wasp comes over.
No buzzing. No signs of aggression. If anything it was friendly.
That Yellow Jacket saw my yellow jacket and decided we were cool
But fuck off
I'm trying to eat my salad
You keep getting way too close to it and buddy, if you land on my chicken, you're dead
He lands on some lettuce (phew)
I pick up and throw that peice of lettuce out the salad onto the grass
With the wasp still clinging too it
At this point I'm amazed by how this wasp is acting
It has to be high or secretly 1/2 bumblebee
Either way the wasp lords aren't gonna like that
He comes back to my salad
I gave him a chunk of lettuce
He comes back
This wasp has figured out that if he lands on something, it's his
So I get up
He's on my lettuce
I start walking
He's still there
I leave the grass for the sidewalk
He remains a trooper
I enter the building
You best believe that he flies off... and lands back on that same peice of lettuce
I throw the lettuce into the garbage
The captain went down with his ship
He has yet to return
He is in fact, trapped by the flap of the garbage can
But damnit he stuck to what he believes in
Lettuce
Too bad lettuce sucks